Saturday, May 31, 2008

Hmph!

This marriage gig. It's hard. Hard like nothing else. Sure I have "I-don't-wanna-be-a-parent" moments, but I have "I-don't-wanna-be-a-wife" DAYS. Weeks.

And each one feels like forever.

Fuckity-fuck.

Up. Down. Up. Down. Coast without communicating. Up. Down. Down.
D
o
w
n
.
.
.

How am I supposed to help, love, honour, live with a man who calls me a c-word?
Seriously.

Wish he'd get his ass up off the effin' floor. I want a partner, a friend, a lover, a co-conspirator, a post for leaning, a hand for holding.

Not this.

Not this.

4 comments:

  1. Love you. Marriage IS hard-wish i had words of wisdom but i guess as life we all just muddle through it. One day at a time reciting "this too shall pass" when it seems to be too much.

    "Unfortunately, a marriage license doesn't come with a job description or a set of instructions. There is definitely "some assembly required." In fact, putting together a modern-day marriage can be likened to assembling an airplane in flight."

    PATRICIA LOVE, The Truth About Love

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  2. I am sorry Belly!! :( I know it is h-a-r-d at times!!! I wish I had magic words to help you, but you my friend are the one that has the way with words. Big hugs to you!!! I hope things are better by the time you are reading this!! Love you!

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  3. I'm so sad to read this.
    I wish I could come and smack him upside the head and magically make him see what a gem he has in you.

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  4. All I can say is I hear where you are coming from. "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" There is a lesson for all of us with all that we go through. Hang in there "this too shall pass" You truly are one of the strongest women i know!~ HuGS!!!!

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