Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Crap Mum of the Year Award goes to...


Mark came home, exhausted, looking for a nap. Loving wife (me) took the boys for a walk after dinner. All was well, until the journey home.

Me: Matthew, walk on the side of the road, please!
Matthew: This is gonna rock! (Hop onto road, hop off!) ....

Me: Matthew, come along. There are cars coming!
Matthew: This is gonna ROCK! (Hops into ditch, laughing hysterically!) ....

Me: Matthew, come NOW, please!

Grab Matthew's arm and tug him across the road, pushing stroller with the other hand. In that toddler way, Matthew suddenly goes limp, which makes me tighten my grip on his forearm and then he picks up his feet! AGH!

There was a weird crack and then he started shrieking...I dropped to the ground with him, scrambling to see what was wrong. His arm. Omigawd, I thought,I broke his effing arm!!!!!

We stumbled home, he balanced precariously on the handle of the stroller, one arm wrapped around my neck, crying. (See the irony?) Me, begging forgiveness and worrying that the ER doctors were SURE to take him away from me; what kind of mother breaks her kid's arm?

Headed straight for Mark, who made him lift his arm, give high-fives, etc. Long story short: Matthew's fine. He was hurt, for sure, but not seriously. No bones broken, we think. But man.....did he EVER put on a show.

This Mummy, it's hard. Haven't wanted a ciggie this much in a long, long, time.

I suck.

Monday, April 21, 2008

Dear Sean Patrick:

(My dear friend, Patti, is pregnant with her second child. This morning, she discovered that her "Bean" is a boy - a younger brother for darling Liam. I am delighted for her, now knowing the special joy that comes with living in a house full of boys!)

Dear Sean,

Your Mama might be worried that she won't love you the way she loves your brother. She might think that the two of you, because you're boys, will be compared, contrasted and in competition for all things, especially her heart.

Wise Auntie Bellymonster is here to let you know that this simply won't be the case. Your Mama will take one look at your handsome, unique little face and melt into love with you. It may not take her by surprise, the way it did with Big Brother Liam, but it will be just as powerful. Maybe even stronger, as she knows how awesome it will be to watch you grow into yourself.

You and your Mama will share many special moments, Sean. Just the two of you, snuggled up nursing, sharing secrets with your eyes and greeting the dawn together. She will look askance to you, in the middle of the chaos of a house of boys and think to herself, "How ever did I get so lucky, to have Sean choose me?" and she will cry, just a little bit, because she's happy and that's what Mamas sometimes do.

You parents will spend a lot of time deciding which of your features match your brother's. This game will delight and confound them for hours at a time - how amazing that the love between made such wonderful little people. You will assert your personality long before your brother did, Sean Patrick. You will do your Mama and your name proud. I just know it.

Looking forward to the Fall, lovey. When magic happens and you'll join us all !

Auntie Belly

Sunday, April 20, 2008

It's Not Easy, Feeling Green

There should be some sort of law, or unwritten rule:

The girl who married the guy you always thought you'd marry (IF you were gonna marry at all, NOT that you're sad that you didn't marry him because, frankly, he was a bit of a pompous jerk) cannot, should not, WHY DOES SHE, look waaaayyyy better than you, pregnant.

She's thin and glowing and pretty and blissed and aaagggghhhh.......

I know I shouldn't care. I know it doesn't matter. I have the world's MOST adorable children and a great husband and I loved being pregnant, even if I did gain a zillion pounds and waddled forever.

Bet she didn't have a moment's morning sickness, either. Or crazy preggo dreams. Bet she fits into all sorts of cute maternity clothes and still wears the same shoe size.

Is it bad that I'm wishing some not-so-nice things upon her? What's a little pre-e among friends?


Friday, April 11, 2008

Love Lessons

This afternoon, I have irrevocably, irretrievably, lost my ever-loving mind.

It's been raining all day - a slanting, frigid rain that made our dash to the car a cross-country event. The boys are fidgety and fussy, both. No one slept well last night, courtesy of our newest nocturnal misadventure, the Toddler Nightmare.

And then, despite a trip to WalMart, where, for once, Matthew was allowed to play with the toys as long as he pleased, AND McDonald's french fries for lunch (how's that for a white-trash morning, eh?)....naptime became battle time.

Four times, I tried to put Matthew down. Four times he came bouncing up - the last time, with a decided smirk and an attitude. "Me want chocolate milk, NOW!"

And so...I lost it. Lost it.

Yelled at my beloved two-year old son. Took off my slipper and threw it across the room. Yelled some more and then dragged Matthew down the stairs to his room: Come Hell or high water, boy, you are going to have a nap!

But when I picked him up to toss him into his crib, I shoved my face into his to yell some more...and burst into tears. Crumbled to the floor, there amongst the dinky cars and discarded socks and wept.

Matthew? Crawled up underneath my arm, to gently place his tiny lips on mine:

"It's ok, Mummy. Don't cry, Mummy."

Shoved his soother in my mouth and then went to stand behind me, to "wrap me in hugs" the way I do when he's crying.

How is it that I, the mother, have learned the greatest lessons in love, forgiveness and patience from my son?

My son. My heart.

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

From A to Z

I love books.

I hope to pass on my love of the written word, and the magic of stepping through the pages of a story, into another world. The boys see that their Dad and I are readers - I hope that Matthew and Luke become avid ones. Compiled here is a list of books I'd like to acquire, so that as a family, we can share in one of life's greatest pleasures - curling up with a good book.

The Places You'll Go!
Of Mice and Men
Catcher in the Rye
Heart of Darkness
Gulliver's Travels
Great Expectations
Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
The English Patient
Three Day Road
The Sun Also Rises
A Tree Grows in Brooklyn
A Wrinkle in Time
The Robber Bride
The Chosen
Davita's Harp
My Name is Asher Lev
Jane Eyre
Fall On Your Knees
The Stone Angel
The Stone Diaries
Jacob Have I Loved
The Kite Runner
A Thousand Splendid Suns